Ask, Not Tell

This was the question wandering in my head before my trip this week in Hsinchu, Taiwan.  The background is that the organization I am working in acquired a local bank in Taiwan, and I went there to deliver a sales class.   Before the trip, I felt both concerned yet excited.   Concerned because:

·         The participants are different from what I usually have.  Culture in a local bank and an international bank can be very different.   From my pre-course research with other trainers who delivered there, the comment is not very positive – conservative, skeptical, always on phone…. and needing lot of breaks to smoke!!

·         The participants are not that well-versed in English, but the training material is in English;

·         My class is the first non-technical training to them.   In local bank, most trainings are technical one.  In other words, non-technical ones are something they are not used to;

On the other hand, I was excited in the sense that I know I am helping them to make a big leap from selling in the local bank mentality to consultative selling…..   It would be amazing if I can inspire at least a few to do it!!

With the above in mind, I have done a lot to prepare – talking to other global trainers who have been here, translating some essential content into Chinese, thinking of ways to make the content easier to be understood given their English level and lack of experience with foreign bank approach…..   and try to sleep well the night before….

To my great delight, the course went well – much better than I expect!!   The group even asked for ‘participation’ themselves when we set the group rule, and most of them were really risk-taking in asking questions or expressing their views during the class.   And more importantly, I can feel that some souls were inspired.  I am happy!!

Looking back, my learning is that:

·         Most people come to the class with good intention to learn, and we as the trainers should believe in that;

·         Preparation is everything.  If your group is likely to be quiet, prepare ways to make the class participation easier for them e.g. having a mechanism where questions can be written on a post-in rather than asked on spot, having variety in delivery to keep the energy high, lightening up the atmosphere at the very start with music, ice-breakers and good content (how the participants feel in the first break is very important to determine their view for the rest of the class)… and most importantly, making yourself approachable – no one like to talk to a bossy trainer!!

·         As always, never settle for sub-standard training facility – in this case, I believe that the better-than-normal venue in a good hotel helped.  Firstly it gave the impression to the participants that this is a good training.  People need to feel important themselves. More importantly, the venue does allow me to focus on the delivery rather than running around to find the break-out area!!!

My simple answer is ‘Deliver something which you truly believe in.’   And this was exactly my reflection for the SPIN class which I delivered in Beijing last week.  The class was a SPIN selling class and it was the 3^rd time which I ran it.   With the experience of the previous 2 classes and late night preparation for this one, I did find myself mastering much more this skills.   More importantly, I am more convinced that this is a concrete piece of skill which really works.   And I know that it works because it did work when I delivered my class using SPIN methodology.   Things like come together – as I immersed myself more and more in SPIN by reading more and thinking for more examples in class preparation, I used it for class delivery as well.   Whenever I want to pass a message to the floor, I ask instead of tell.   And I let them feel the ‘pain’ first before guide them to feel the ‘benefit’!!

Like selling, class delivery is a kind of persuasion – in short, you are persuading the others to ‘buy-in’ your ideas.  

I used it, I know it works and thus I believe it.   And I feel good to try to influence the others to use something I believe.  It is engaging to myself.   I enjoy the passion inside myself to try think of different ways to influence them!!  

Love to do more!

I always remind my presentation class participants that you should avoid letting the screen / powerpoint to be the focus of your presentation. Quite a lot of presenters commit this mistake – light dim, presenter sitting down, and then slides after slides after…. Instead, the presenters should take charge – stand up, project your energy, ‘blacken’ the screen when you speak, use powerpoint only to aid but not replace your message!! After all, human being rather than the mircosoft powerpoint can connect better to human being. And after all, if the latter can do better, we do not need to be physically organise a presentation!! Just send out the powerpoint file + voice tape.

However, if we include participants in the comparsion, the focus should shift further to them rather than the presenter!! Bearing this in mind will guide you to do a even better presentation. For example, you will ‘cut’ your message into managable size so that the participants can ‘digest’. You will avoid long lecture, and instead you will introduce different delivery method.

We have spent a weekend in Chengdu, China last week for holiday. Whilst I once travelled there in 1993, there is almost no place I can recognize now. Well, partly bad memory, partly lot of development in this city.

Chengdu is an old city with lots of historical attractions. I am most impressive by the Dujiangyan Irrigation System 都江堰水利工程. It is simply amazing to imagine that someone built the system over 2,000 years ago, and the system has been working well to protect lives in Chengdu for so long!!! (See the photo on the left.)

Back to our blog topic – let me share with you all a piece of learning from the guide of the local one-day tour we joined there. She is called Little Li, an energetic and cheerful girl. On our way to the destination from Chengdu downtown, Little Li explained to us the tour logistics arrangement. What interested me most is how she introduced the ‘ground rule’ of the tour. The ‘ground rule’ in this setting is very much like what we have in training or facilitation environment – a commonly-agreed set of behaviours / non-behaviours.

Little Li said,’In the coming destination, if you smoke (which is very common in China!!), you will be fined for RMB100 by the tourist authority, or you have to wait on the spot until you find someone else smokes!! (She got some laugh.) We do not want people to smoke in our tour bus as well especially since it is air-conditioned. So, we will also impose fine if someone smokes in the bus. I will not keep the fine myself. Instead, we will all share it by buying extra dishes during lunch with the fine.’

Once I heard it, I found very familar – it is like our attempt to stop participants from using mobile phone in the class!! In addition, I was thinking to myself whether it is a good way to set the ‘ground rule’. Perhaps somewhat different.

What I would say, ‘In the coming destination, if you smoke, you will be fined for RMB100 by the tourist authority, or you have to wait on the spot until you find someone else smokes!! (To get some laugh) By the way, who do not smoke in our bus? Please kindly raise your hand if you do not smoke. (To create the group atmosphere that someone do not want the smoke) OK, I saw a few hands there. Perhaps we should have our rule here. Any suggestion what the person should do if he / she smokes in the bus? (Keep silence hopefully to get some participation though not very likely…) (If no) May I suggest…. (a consequence)?’

Why such change? I am always hesitated to use fine as the consequence of breaching the ground rule. Money could be a touchy subject. It would be quite odd if someone refuses to pay. You will also be in trouble if someone is willing to pay, but in the sense of buying the mis-behaviour e.g. saying ‘OK, how much does it cost? RMB100 for each time I smoke, right? Here is RMB500 and I will keep on smoking….’.

Instead, I prefer to first use group pressure as the motivation – showing that somone do not want the mis-behaviour e.g. raising hand or inducing some discussion against the undesirable behaviour. Then, introduce a consequence (a non-monetary one) e.g. saying ‘those who smoke in the bus will have to come out to do a performance for all of us, to our satisfaction!!’ The fear of coming out in front of crowd can well be a consequence!!

I attended a briefing for new-joiners by the internal HR profession. The briefing is to both to give information and welcome them into the company. In one module, she introduced the company’s compensation and reward arrangement, and somehow she started by asking the audience, ‘Who is satisfied with your current reward package?’. Not surprisingly, the only response from the floor is silence….. and confused faces.

Whilst it is a good idea to use question to arouse interaction, the question itself is obviously bad. Let’s think in more details why:

Non-answerable – well, no one will say in front of the crowd to the HR people that he / she is not or is satisfied with the pay when he / she just joins the organization. The question just cannot arouse interaction;

Undesirable response – The HR profession definitely does not want to have someone answering ‘I am not happy with my pay’, which is possible response (if any response). Not only it is difficult to handle such a response, but also this will just ruin the party.

Creditability dropped – Sophisticated audience will see that this is a bad question. The HR profession’s creditability just dived right after asking this. (She did encounter challenging questions on other areas afterward)

Though it seems quite obvious that questions like this are very counter-productive to the effectiveness in communication, you will see speakers committing such mistakes from time to time. Sometimes, inappropriate words just come out of their months out of their plans. Why? I wonder say:

Preparation – Did you make the effort in advance to know the participants, the objective of the event, or even talk to those who have presented before?

Thinking on your foot – it is about sensing the atmosphere, event themes, and then saying sensible things. Experience counts here. Some just do it worse than the others.

I had a lot of sympathy towards this HR profession, and I tried to help by asking questions who are easy to answer in that session. I am sure that as she does more of this, she will get better.

I facilitated a program last month which consisted of sessions delivered by various speakers. Wearing the hat of a trainer, especially as a presentation trainer, there were a few moments which I almost could not help to intervene. Let me share these with you so that we can avoid them in the future:

Comparing the participants ‘down’ – One speaker started his session by asking a few questions. Whilst the questions were not ‘easily-answerable’ questions (I shall discuss more in the future posts on the topic of ‘easily-answerable’ questions), the participants were not very responsive – there were moments of silence. The speaker then made some unnecessarily-damaging comment along the line ‘You guys in Shanghai are quiet. I were in Shenzhen last week. Your colleagues in Shenzhen were much more active.” Together with his tone, it was obvious that he was comparing the participants down as compared to their counterparts in the south!! Big No-No!! No one likes to be lectured on ‘what I did wrong’, especially when there was no precise right or wrong in that case – ‘what is wrong if I do not speak up’ . In particular, you do not want lecture them especially since you want their cooperation in your presentation!!

Act like their bosses – There was another speaker who just shouted, pointed her finger and ordered the participants to answer questions. Well, this is another to-do if you want to shut people down. Arguably, you can do it if you are really… the boss…. but still… I consider it undesirable. My philosophy is that you should consider all presentation to be a sales presentation. In other words, you have to win people over, no matter what your position are. Well, your (senior) position can win over the participants’ bodies (in being there), but not their heart to really absorb and carry out the messages you try to get across!!

无论你所处的场合是training, facilitation或presentation，与台下参与者的互动也是有效沟通的重要技巧。 简单来说，互动是重要的原因包括以下：

增加信心 - 在你的环节开始的时候与台下互动是其中一种减低紧张的方法。大部分的演讲者在开始前也会因为考虑太多关于台下参与者的问题而紧张。例如，‘他们会问难以回 答的问题吗？’，‘他们会觉得闷吗？’，‘他们会留意我的演讲吗？’。 与台下对话，感觉他们，让自己知道他们是OK的，这会大大增大你的信心！

弄清楚WIIFM – ‘What Is It for Me?’或‘关我啥事’（对，是必较口语化，但传神！）。 事前的准备是回答WIIFM最主要的做法。但是，总会有些事情是你不能预计的，例如，真正出席的
参与者跟会前提供给你的资料不相符。 所以，当场的互动如提问能让你吸取有用的信息，例如，参与者关心的题目。 同样重要的是，这种互动会让参与者觉得你是关心对他们重要的事情！

保持注意力 - 作为演讲者，其中一个主要挑战是成人的注意力只能维持很短的时间 – 例：美国海军曾在1970年代研究人类只能连续注意18分钟。参与者在桌下把玩他们的手机，blackberry对我们已不是什麽新鲜的事情。保持他们‘清醒’最好的方法就是让他们参与！

我将花多个环节讨论‘互动’。

Interacting with the participants is essential to make your communication essential – no matter whether the communication take places in the training, facilitation or presentation setting. In short, interaction is important since:

Confidence gaining – One way to alleviate your nerviousness is to interact with the participants in the beginning. Most presenters become nervous before the event starts because he / she ‘thinks’ too much about the participants. Questions coming to mind include ‘ Will they ask difficult questions?’, ‘Will they be bored?’, ‘Will they not pay attention to my delivery?’, etc. Interacting with them, experiencing them as human being, feeling that they are OK people helps a great deal to gain confidence!!

WIIFM clarifying – ‘What Is It for Me?’. Preparation before the event is the major way to answer WIIFM for you. Yet, there is always something unexpected when the event really takes place e.g. participants turning out not to be what was described by the organiser. Therefore, on-site interaction like asking question will gather information e.g. participants’ area of interest for you. Equally importantly, it shows to the participants that you care what is important to them!!

Attention retaining – One of the major challenges to you is that adult has only limited attention span – around 20 minutes as indicated by some study. It is not new to you (and me!!) to witness someone playing his / her mobile phone, blackberry, etc under the table!! Keep them involved in action is the best way to keep them ‘awake’!!

I shall spend quite a number of more entries to discuss about interaction.